To tell my story and why I am a Connector with the Macks Jewish Connection Network, I’ll start in the summer of 2019, a few years before I started with the organization. I was 30 years old, a new mother to a 9-month-old daughter and just said goodbye to my husband who died from cancer. 

Adam and I were each other’s best support system and had a million plans for the future, including more kids and an expanded circle of family and friends to share our lives with. My eye toward the future and my family life all came to a crashing halt. And despite the best, most supportive friends and family in the world, I felt so cheated and so deeply alone.  

I spent much of the subsequent three years working through grief and my new dual identities of young mother and widow. In 2022, I decided that I wanted to create a community for Jewish widows in the Baltimore area who are also “way too young for this”–widows who are young, with or without kids who are infants through high school aged.

“Way Too Young For This”

It was around this time when I met Addie Lewis Klein, executive director of the Jewish Connection Network, at an Associated meeting. I asked Addie if Jewish Connection Network would consider branching out to include a Connector group for young widows and our families.

While there are many different and meaningful avenues in Jewish Baltimore to connect with other widows, I always felt on the fringe, an outsider because of my age, my daughter’s age and my stage in life. Over the past several years, I, both unfortunately and fortunately, had met other young Jewish widows in Baltimore on an individual level, but I wanted to form a community for all of us.  Addie and Erica Bloom of Jewish Connection Network were immediately supportive of my idea, and the “Way Too Young for This” group was formed.

As a “Way Too Young for This” community, we laugh, we cry and most importantly, we understand one another on a level that most others in our lives don’t.

Being a grieving parent can make the holidays feel awful, but when you have young kids, you don’t want your grief to overshadow the holiday joy for them.  One aspect of our “Way Too Young for This” community is to make connecting with your kids through Jewish holidays as a widow a little easier, and to not feel alone while you’re doing it. 

For example, last year our group gathered for dinner and a Tu B’shevat program at my house, where I provided everyone with soil and parsley seeds to plant with their kids. It’s a small act but knowing that our community is taking care of helping to create these positive Jewish memories takes some of the weight off of an otherwise heavy holiday season. Looking toward Chanukah next month, I know we will gather again and create positive memories over latkes and growing friendships.

I am so grateful to the Jewish Connection Network and The Associated for financially supporting our continued gatherings, which allow us to feel safe and comforted in our sadness and our hopes for the future. The “Way Too Young for This” community is unique in many ways, and with the programmatic and financial support from our partners, we are filling an important need in our community. When you feel like you have someone who “gets it” to confide in and to lend you a hand, your life is still hard, but you have a community to reach out to — you know that you’re not alone.

If you or someone you know is a Jewish widow who is “way too young for this,” please share with them that this community exists. We intend to gather again in December and celebrate Chanukkah together, and welcome anyone who needs this community. Please reach out for the date and location. We don’t ever wish this pain on anyone, but the comfort we feel from coming together is incredibly meaningful.